Don't Marry; or, Advice on How, When and Who to Marry

"Don't Marry; or, Advice on How, When and Who to Marry" by James W. Donovan is a guidebook on marital advice written in the late 19th century. This work takes a critical look at marriage, offering a series of don'ts to help readers navigate the complexities of choosing a life partner. The tone is both cautionary and instructive, aiming to provide practical wisdom for prospective couples about the pitfalls of romantic expectations and the importance of making thoughtful, informed decisions about marriage. The opening of the book sets the stage for this advisory tone, outlining the central theme that the selection of a marriage partner should not be taken lightly. Donovan emphasizes the importance of considerations beyond mere attraction or wealth, warning against marrying for superficial reasons like beauty or money and highlighting the value of character and mutual respect. With examples and anecdotes, he advises that thoughtful selections must be made based on a comprehensive understanding of both partners' qualities to avoid long-term unhappiness. This introduction firmly establishes the premise that marriage requires more than just romance; it necessitates careful consideration of compatibility and shared values.