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He Comes Next

Written by Ian Kerner

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240 pages, about 5 hours of reading

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About this book

The companion book to Ian Kerner's smash success She Comes First, He Comes Next offers women his sometimes radical, always expert advice on everything from the nature of male desire to sex-techniques that work While women everywhere benefited from Ian Kerner's sexual philosophy of female pleasure in She Comes First, now it's time to learn all about what turns men on and makes them stay on. In He Comes Next, Kerner covers every angle of male sexuality, illuminates the most common sex-life ruts, and offers practical, knowledgeable answers to women's most frequently asked questions. In his role as a sex therapist, Kerner has spoken with countless men not only about the best sex they ever had, but also perhaps more important about the best sex they never had -- experiences they always desired and fantasized about, but were afraid to share with their partners. In the spirit of "full exposure," He Comes Next is the closest you'll ever come to waking up in a guy's skin and knowing what truly makes him sexually tick. Sexual pleasure goes beyond tips and tactics, however. Our sexual identities -- and the expression, gratification, and growth of these identities -- is fundamental to the success of our intimate relationships. With step-by-step and -- yes -- blow-by-blow detail, Kerner provides a clear, concise, achievable vision of sexual pleasure, one in which each technique forwards the action and where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Written in the same witty, insightful, and utterly readable voice that has made She Comes First and Be Honest -- You're Not That Into Him Either so popular, He Comes Next is the thinking woman's guide to enjoying sex to the fullest and ensuring that he does the same.

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Reading guide

Themes, characters and key ideas in He Comes Next, written by Chaptra AI.

  • about 5 hours
  • intermediate
  • informative
  • practical
  • empowering

He Comes Next by Ian Kerner serves as the essential male-focused counterpart to his popular She Comes First, offering women an insightful and practical guide to understanding and enhancing male sexual pleasure. Drawing from his extensive experience as a sex therapist, Kerner demystifies male desire, addresses common sexual ruts, and provides actionable techniques designed to deepen intimacy and satisfaction for both partners. The book emphasizes moving beyond superficial tips to foster a comprehensive understanding of male sexual identity, empowering women to explore and fulfill their partners' unspoken desires. It aims to transform sexual encounters into more profound and gratifying experiences by illuminating what truly makes men 'sexually tick.'

“While women everywhere benefited from Ian Kerner's sexual philosophy of female pleasure in She Comes First, now it's time to learn all about what turns men on and makes them stay on.”

Key themes

Understanding Male Sexual Desire and Physiology
This theme explores the intricate mechanisms behind male arousal, pleasure, and orgasm, moving beyond simplistic or stereotypical views. It delves into both the physical aspects and the psychological drivers of male desire, including fantasies and unspoken needs, providing a comprehensive anatomical and emotional map.
Sexual Communication and Intimacy
The book heavily emphasizes the critical role of open, honest, and empathetic communication in achieving mutual sexual satisfaction. It addresses how to broach sensitive topics, share desires, and create a safe space for vulnerability, highlighting that true intimacy is built on spoken and unspoken understanding.
Female Empowerment through Understanding Male Sexuality
While focused on men, the book ultimately empowers women by giving them agency and confidence in their sexual relationships. Knowledge about male desire allows women to be more effective, responsive, and ultimately, more satisfied partners, transforming them into active participants rather than passive recipients.

Worth discussing

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